We're Not Here To Fuck Spiders Notebook

We’re Not Here To Fuck Spiders Notebook

A meeting agenda with an Australian accent.

This notebook exists for rooms where the small talk has overstayed its visa. The cover says we’re not here to fuck spiders, which is a polite way of announcing that the point is the point and the rest can wait in the car.

Write the plan. Write the deadline. Write the name of the person who just turned a five-minute job into a committee. Then close it and do the thing.

The useful part

• 80 pages for lists that actually end
• Hardcover that survives being slapped on a table mid-sentence
• Lined pages, because wandering is how spiders get involved
• Looks like stationery. Operates like a cattle prod made of paper.

Bring it to

• Meetings that start with “just a quick sync”
• Group chats that should have been one message
• Projects drowning in vibes and starving for a decision
• Gifting anyone who is done circling the airport

May reduce waffle, increase output, and cause at least one person to ask what it means, which is already taking too long.

Open it. Write it. We’re not here to fuck spiders.